I couldn't sleep this morning (around 5a) so I popped in a movie, one I hadn't
seen for awhile... Rob Reiner's "This Is Spinal Tap"...
Ozzy Ozbourne once said on a talk show that he went to see it in the theaters
and was the only one not laughing because "it happens, people...". That's not
really my point in bringing the film up, but His Ozzness is right... just
click back through last year's Road Rashes... I've said it before but here's a
new twist on my line... "I don't HAVE to make this stuff up, folks..."
My actual point is that in the film Tap plays "Shank Hall - Milwaukee
Wisconsin"... it's the scene where they do "Stonehenge" and the way-too-small
monolith descends to be pranced all over by two little people... the theater
Spinal Tap is playing in for the film is about three times what the real
place holds, capacity-wise... but we could have used that room for this show,
I'll tell you what...
The drive to Milwaukee from Chicago is a blink...
... USUALLY...
... but not (and I can almost HEAR your gasp of surprise) at 5p on a @#*&%
FRIDAY NIGHT!!!
... well, we meant well by our plan...
Before we could leave the state of Illinois, the Department of "Tolls For
Roads That Have Been Built And Are Now Legal Coin Siphons" got us one more time,
in the guise of a bottleneck in the traffic just after the toll plaza that was
SO BAD that we sat looking, waiting, and hoping to see that nasty white
plastic basket you'd have to be... well... this year's Chicago Bulls' starting
line-up to miss...
... and before you sports fans jump me for makin' a crack like that, check the
papers... I don't follow 'em and even I know they're stinkin' up the floor...
So we're stuck in this jam... Scott, Beau, Hazdra, and myself... styling in
the Hazdra Cruiser... listening to the new Other Ones disc...
... and quietly going postal...
All the while, "I PASS" holders (the "subscription key" that emits a radio
signal allowing drivers to breeeeeeeeze through tollbooths without slowing or
stopping, as well as leaving an electronic trail anyone can track) are flying
by, and we're convinced that they're thumbing their noses at us to a man...
turns out this victory of theirs is short-lived as they hit the same snarl,
just further up... in effect adding to our misery anyway by "Automotive Line-
Jumping"...
Once we got clear of all that hooey it was smooth all the way to the Shank...
We pulled up and got parked to unload what we had with us, and I decided to
once again leave my rack gear in the van... the house really had everything I
needed...
... one of these days Beau is just gonna leave my stuff on the curb figuring
I'll never ask for it to go to the mix position, why waste the effort...
We got set up in fair order and sound check went smoothly if just a tad late,
and as we were finishing up the first of the people were let in...
... we, of course, wandered backstage and huddled around the largely
inadequate space heater and told ghost stories...
Some of the guys ate take-out of various description, my own meal of spaghetti
being so salted down I ended up choosing starvation over rampant
dehydration... but bless Scott and Beau for bringing it back for me anyway...
the bread was good... and I ate a bit of the accompanying "salad"...
As showtime approached I peeked out the curtain/door of the back area and the
place was pretty well full-up... we had a decent showing last time we played
here so we figured it would be about the same, but this already looked like
more than las-
... I'm sorry... what?
... OK, ya got me...
... I DID make the 'ghost story' part up...
... good eye, chief! Gotta keep you on yer toes, right?
"Well 'round (nine) o'clock... I said the place was packed... front doors they
was locked... I said the place was packed..."
We received word at ten minutes to 9p that the club was officially sold out
and no one else was being admitted...
This is a good thing for US, not so good for the poor people who either left
or waited in line for late admittance (by some accounts for over an hour)...
but others were not to be turned away or held off so quietly...
We had us our first gen-u-ine case of "gate crashing" that night... I need to
back up here for a minute and explain a feature of the club to give you the
full picture, though...
The first time we played at the club we asked if the backstage door could be
opened and were summarily told "ABSOLUTELY NOT..." due to an alarm system on
the fire doors...
... we thought it was BS at the time but decided not to put it to the test...
and I'm glad we didn't...
When you open one of those doors, all sorts of Hell breaks loose... strobe
lights, high frequency ringing... I thought the PA was freaking out for a
minute... until I saw the Shank security spring into action like the guys on
the Springer show...
... c'mon you college students, chant with me... "STEVE! STEVE! STEVE!"...
These dudes were knocking over blissed hippies in their path, and it was weird
to watch go down... the weirdest part being that the crashers were running
into the crowd and CROUCHING... a better ploy might have been to just jump in
and start dancing... you know we all look alike, brothers and sisters...
The show that evening was 1/24/93 Oakland Coliseum and it had several moments
of inspiration, most notably "Sugaree" by which time I had fixed the mix to
the amount of bodies in the room (call me the "Sonic Taylor")... and "Loser",
which was explosive... the set ended with a lilting "Birdsong" and it was time
for a break...
... at which time I groveled at the bands' feet begging forgiveness for
feedback, etc...
...luckily they like my writing...
The band took the stage again to a roar of approval... second set opener was a
fine if somewhat short "Playin'" into "Crazy Fingers" (ALWAYS one of my favs)
into a rowdy version of "Samson" easing into "He's Gone" where I got to play
with some delay on the cadence before a drum pad-soaked "Drumz"...
After "Space" Maraat led the band gently into "Last Time" before John brought
the pulse down momentarily for "Black Peter" and a so-familiar "Sugar
Magnolia" to finish...
After the encore of "Heaven's Door" the band sent the sold-out crowd home with
"Deal"...
I was wandering around yakkin' with folks after the show when I noticed some
guys feverishly looking at the floor with flashlights... I had seen this sort
of gathering before, and sure enough I was right... one poor bastard had lost
a contact lens on the dark carpet floor... I joined the search party and
after about twenty minutes and beating astronomical odds, we found the little
bugger...
The guy left happy with his friends, and we left secure in the knowledge we
had done everything we could for the paying public...
... well, OK... I'd have felt pretty good even if the guy HADN'T found his
lens...
... who am I trying to fool, right?
After Beau had gotten the packing done we headed to Madison, Wisconsin for our
gig the next night at the Barrymore Theater, the idea being to get into town
and get a fair bit of rest before load-in Saturday afternoon... we had a bunch
of stuff to deal with for the show in Madison and we really needed to be on
our best...
Did it go smoothly with nothing to report?
What do YOU think?
OOOOoohhhhhh yes, cats 'n' kittens... it only gets better from here...
COMING SOON: "Singles, Singles Everywhere... And Not A Bed To Sleep"...
Denny's By Any Name... Coffee, Keys, And The Search For The Guitar That Will
Set The Early Shows Free... Radio People... And MUCH MUCH MORE...
See Ya Around The Playground!